Of course Jack Wilshere signed with West Ham

West Ham has confirmed, with an elaborate and massively cheesy video, that former Arsenal midfielder Jack Wilshere has agreed to terms on a three-year contract with the club:

Wilshere was out of contract this summer, and talks between him and new head coach Unai Emery regarding the vision the new man had were quite brief and to the point that helped the midfielder realize quickly he wasn’t wanted around Arsenal any longer. While there seemed to be steam last week that Jack and Turkish club Fenerbahce were close to a deal, talk never seemed to subside linking Wilshere, a boyhood fan of West Ham, with the east London club.

And if there’s ever a more perfect pairing between club and player, besides Paolo di Canio and Lazio (who also once played for West Ham!), then someone will have to alert me to it. Because if there’s one supporters group who thrives on local, English boys full of passion and fire, it’s the Hammers. And while Wilshere’s on-field skills and physical strength has eroded over the years due to various unfortunate injuries, the two things he’s still rated 99 on in FIFA is “determination” and “grit”. It shouldn’t take him long to get stuck up in an opponent’s face, which will no doubt please his new fans.

At any rate, good luck Jack Wilshere. May you forever blow bubbles (and cigarette smoke rings). And I dare you to try your small, angry, tough guy complex against Arsenal.