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Monday Cannon Fodder: a big weekend


Good Monday morning, TSFers. I hope you’re rested and feeling alright after the Super Bowl festivities were extended by overtime. The commercials were alright in my estimation, not the worst year, not the best. The Usher halftime show was excellent. Everything is millenial-coded now, a clear indication that my generation is now the target demo and a reminder that we’re getting older. Father Time stays undefeated.

We’ve had a full slate of Premier League action (with Crystal Palace - Chelsea today), so let’s hope to it.

Manchester City 2 - Everton 0
Everton stuck around in this one and gave City a decent go. Erling Haaland is really good. Right now, the Premier League title looks like it is City’s to lose. It has been all season, but, as we seem to regularly do now, we’d sorta forgotten about them.

Wolves 0 - Brentford 2
A much needed win for the Bees, who were starting to slip towards the relegation zone. Ivan Toney scored in the second half to seal the points, then made some somewhat inflammatory remarks about the club and Thomas Frank not wanting to keep him. The more a microphone is put in front of him (Toney), the less appealing a transfer target he becomes.

Fulham 3 - Bournemouth 1
A good result for the Cottagers, who had stalled out a bit. Bournemouth, who earlier in the season looked a solid relegation candidate, seem pretty safe. Rodrigo Muniz was at the double for the home side.

Tottenham 2 - Brighton 1
Brighton really got it wrong in this one. They were dominating the game then made a bunch of subs, which cost them all their control. Spurs scored the winner with basically the last kick of the game. It’s mind-boggling how with seconds to play, Brighton could get caught out at the back that badly on the break. Also, Spurs only had the ball because Brighton were denied a corner by an offside flag that I’d really like to see again. It was extremely close and may not have been offside.

Luton Town 1 - Sheffield United 3
An excellent result for the non-Luton teams at the bottom. Sheffield are going down, so them taking points off a suddenly frisky Luton side helps everyone else.

Liverpool 3 - Burnley 1
Jurgen Klopp and the Reds did a whole bunch of celebrating for a side winning at home against a relegation club. I thought we weren’t supposed to do that kind of thing.

Nottingham Forest 2 - Newcastle 3
The wildest game of the weekend. Forest twice pegged back the home side but couldn’t make it stick. It’s incredibly annoying to me that Arsenal faced Newcastle’s best performance of the season (and still needed a dodgy goal against to drop points) and since then, the Magpies have been proper mediocre.

Aston Villa 1 - Manchester United 2
Are Manchester United back — is what everyone will be asking because apparently they don’t have the capacity to talk about anything else. United hadn’t beaten a club in the top six away in some silly amount of time. Unai Emery, y’all.

A list with a few thoughts / comments about the Super Bowl commercials. Let us know which ones you liked / didn’t like in the comments. Please make Temu go away. I’m not interested in your app that sells low quality goods from sketchy sources, and according to the internet, will almost certainly get my personal info stolen and sold. They’re owned by some gigantic Chinese conglomerate with a $170B market cap.

  • M&M Ring of Comfort with Marino, TO, and Scarlett Johanson made me chuckle.
  • Dove Women’s Sports ad was good. Important to highlight the dropout rate and give some optimism for improving it.
  • He Gets Us spent $14M on ads during the Super Bowl for Jesus. Clearly, they don’t get him because he’d be appalled they’ve spent that much money on commercials when they could have fed, clothed, and housed the needy.
  • Mountain Dew Baja Blast commercial was terribly disappointing. Somehow they took Aubrey Plaza and Nick Offerman and made a not good, not funny ad.
  • The Lindt ad was terrible.
  • Kawasaki ad with mullets and Stone Cold Steve Austin was among the better ones of the night.
  • I enjoyed the Leo Messi, Jason Sudiekis ad even if it was a bit milquetoast. Then again, that’s kinda Messi’s brand, isn’t it?
  • Michael Cera for CeraVe was fantastic, one of the best.
  • The Starry ad with Ice Spice was awful.
  • The BMW Christopher Walken ad was really good.
  • State Farm, Arnold Schwarzenegger was funny.
  • E*Trade babies playing pickleball made me chuckle.
  • Hellman’s Mayo cat with Kate McKinnon and a Pete Davidson cameo was amusing.
  • I really enjoyed the Reese’s commercial where the people alternated between smashing and fixing things in the living room as the ad gave more info about the release.
  • The Dunkin Donuts ad with J.Lo, Ben Affleck, Matt Damon, and Tom Brady was incredible, among the best, if not the best of the night for me.
  • The RFK presidential campaign ad...WTF? I thought I was watching some sort of throwback ad for JFK. He apparently apologized on social media for upsetting family members, claiming he had no input, that it was a PAC that did it. The apology rings a bit hollow though — he had the ad pinned to his Twitter profile, at least for a time.
  • I’m pleased the Budweiser Clydesdales showed up again. They’d been missing for a year or two lately, I think. Also, a cute dog saved the beer delivery, so that’s good.
  • I hope the Pfizer ad made a bunch of dumb people angry.
  • The NFL’s International Player Program spot was great. Apparently Osi Umenyiora does overseas broadcasts and he was in tears after watching it.
  • The Doritos Dina and Mita ad was funny. I’ve generally liked Doritos commercials, although I know their usual ad style isn’t for everybody.
  • The Drumstick commercial using a midair emergency as the plot for their commercial was a truly awful decision.
  • I have a particular affinity for the show Scrubs, so anything that has JD (Zach Braff) and Turk (Donald Faison) will appeal to me. Jason Momoa singing along with them was good, too.

I may have missed a few things, but that’s more or less what my notes had.