Monday cannon fodder: Double intoxication medical

Jermain Defoe: Rangers set to sign Bournemouth striker, 36, on 18-month loan - BBC Sport
Rangers are set to sign former England striker Jermain Defoe on an 18-month loan deal from Bournemouth.

Troy Deeney: FA asks Watford captain to explain comments after Bournemouth draw - BBC Sport
The Football Association asks Watford captain Troy Deeney to explain his comments following Wednesday's 3-3 draw with Bournemouth.

What happens in a football medical? How to pass one, and why some players don't | FourFourTwo
Most players glide through them, but others can see their moves put in doubt.

FA Cup third round serves up shocks as Barnet, Oldham and Newport strike | Football | The Guardian
Barnet provided the biggest surprise on Sunday’s FA Cup third round.

Wayne Rooney arrested in US for public intoxication and swearing | Football | The Guardian
England’s top goalscorer arrested and released in December after paying $25 fine.

Daniëlle van de Donk hits double as Arsenal survive West Ham scare in WSL | Football | The Guardian
Arsenal made up for defensive depletion to come from behind.

Real Madrid 0-2 Real Sociedad: Visitors earn surprise win at Bernabeu - BBC Sport
Real Madrid suffer a surprise defeat by Real Sociedad as the visitors end a four-match losing streak in La Liga.

Watch: Rashford laughs at himself after falling over ball when through on goal - Planet Football
Marcus Rashford couldn't help but laugh at himself.

Is West Ham's millennium bug finally getting cured? - Football365
They were steady and reliable in the 20th century, anything but in the 21st. Are the Hammers finally settling down again?

Tottenham Ladies player says opponent made monkey noises at her | Football | The Guardian
FA launches inquiry after Renée Hector says she was racially abused.

‘No idea where money goes’: Fifa urged to help Somalia’s women footballers | Football | The Guardian
Fifa funds allocated to women’s football in Somalia are alleged not to be reaching their target.

Manchester City’s Leroy Sané reignites title race with winner against Liverpool | Football | The Guardian
For yet another year, there is only one Invincibles.

Time to notice Georginio Wijnaldum, the central figure in Liverpool’s surge | Football | The Guardian
No one has played more of a part in Liverpool's unbeaten season than their Dutch midfielder.

‘Do what is right’: Newcastle fan groups urge Mike Ashley to sell or invest funds | Football | The Guardian
A fans’ collective have joined forces to write an open letter to Mike Ashley, urging him to sell up or provide transfer funds.

United States Based Pulisic Fan Can’t Find Chelsea On A Map Of England — The Nutmeg News
It’s funny because it’s not 100% wrong