Arsenal injury news: Koscielny and Inspector Clouseau updates

Arsenal are kind of a hollowed out shell right now, particularly at the back. This post isn’t here, sadly, to bring you exciting new transfer news about replacement players, nor is it here to herald the instant return from injury of anyone in particular. Sorry about that.

What it is about, though, is a quick update on a couple players. First up, we have Laurent Koscielny, who took a shot to the face from Romelu Lukaku’s foot that, luckily, didn’t break his jaw, but that did require minor surgery to clear up some blood clotting. He still can’t eat or chew, but he won’t have to have his jaw wired shut for weeks, so that’s a good thing I guess? Although it probably won’t be a long-term absence, there’s no date set for his return yet. I’m guessing he’ll need to be able to, yanno, eat stuff first.

And then there’s fashion slave and porn mustache aficionado Hector Bellerin. He ripped up his ACL a couple weeks ago, needed surgery, and apparently decided to go visit the set of your favorite 1970’s TV medical drama to get his surgery done:

In much better news than that setting would indicate, the surgery went well; he now faces probably six or seven months of rehab and strength-building before his return, probably early next season. Hopefully the attention given to that facility from Hector’s presence there will inspire them to upgrade their art, at the very least.