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Your favorite Gunners reimagined as film characters

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A little something to hopefully eke out a smile on this cold, sad Monday.

Is Nacho secretly an expert swordsman?
Photo by Gareth Cattermole/Getty Images

If you feel anything like I did after watching Arsenal drop three points at City, then you may need something to cheer you up. So I put together this list of Arsenal players and who they would play in movies, complete with horrible Photoshops! Some of them are absolutely perfect. Some of them are a bit of a stretch. Hopefully they garner a few chuckles either way.

Nacho Monreal - Inigo Montoya (The Princess Bride)

Name one time you’ve seen Nacho and Inigo in the same place. Exactly, I can’t either. Who knows what the Spaniard gets up to off the pitch, but who’s to say it isn’t a little swordplay. I reckon their personalities are pretty similar too, since Monreal seems like a witty fellow. Fun fact; he also looks just like Peter Crouch!

Alex Oxlade-Chamberlain - Michelangelo (Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles)

This one is based purely on looks, but you can’t tell me the resemblance isn’t just uncanny, right? In fact, after getting a tip about this one from one of my colleagues, a quick Google search revealed that he’s acknowledged that he looks like a TMNT. He even said Mikey’s tagline, “COWABUNGA!”, in a commercial!

Granit Xhaka - Jay Gatsby (The Great Gatsby)

Now this may be a bit of a stretch. It’s really mostly based on hairstyle, which I could’ve sworn was exactly like Leo’s in The Great Gatsby on Sunday, but which apparently no cameras have successfully captured. So I found the closest thing I could.

Mesut Özil - Peter Lorre (Literally any movie with this guy in it)

Lorre was an Austro-Hungarian stage-performer-turned-actor who made it big in America between the 30’s and 50’s. Early on, some of his roles included serial killer, murderer, detective, basically anything involving crime and treachery. Later in his career, he turned out to be a very versatile actor! Now it’s time for our favorite game: Özil or Lorre? Answers are at the bottom.

Tomáš Rosický (Yeah I know he doesn’t play for us anymore but still) - Loki (Thor & Marvel Movies)

This one is too good to pass up. You have Loki, former king of Asgard, and Rosický, former king of... injuries? They resemble each other so well, I had to include it. The Czech made 170 appearances for the Gunners and served the midfield well; now he resides in his home country playing for Sparta Prague, where his career began.

Wojciech Szczęsny - Vincent Vega (Pulp Fiction)

This may be the worst photoshop in all of history. But if only Woj would grow out his hair, these two would be the exact same person. Also, I just remembered how good this movie is and now I’m gonna go watch it.

Obviously, this isn’t a full XI; we need some help to flesh it out. Let us know in the comments who else you think deserves a role!

Answers to “Özil or Lorre?”

L Ö Ö

L L Ö

Ö L Ö