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Tuesday Cannon Fodder

It me, sub guy again!

New York Red Bulls v Vancouver Whitecaps FC
This thing is nightmare fuel
Photo by Jeff Vinnick/Getty Images

Howdy! Ben’s off doing Ben things today, so I’m foddering in his place.

I’m just getting back into the swing of things after a weekend in Vancouver BC, where I watched the Timbers - who needed to win to make the playoffs but more importantly not lose by three in order to win back the Cascadia Cup - managed to do neither of those things, falling meekly and embarrassingly 4-1 to the Vancouver Whitecaps on MLS Decision Day 2016. That result also means that, for the first time since MLS adopted its current playoff format almost 15 years ago, neither participant in last year’s championship game is in the playoffs this year. History!

One of the teams in said playoffs is the LA Galaxy, to whom Landon Donovan returned this year after retiring. Turns out his retirement was as permanent as was Leo Messi’s from international play.

You’ve probably already had a good laugh at Manchester United, but as I say I was otherwise occupied yesterday, so I had that good laugh today. I also read this article on what it would take to stop the rot.

Owen Hargreaves is one who wonders what it would take to get Mou to play Henrik Mkhitaryan.

ESPN FC wonders if it’s time to start rotating Cristiano Ronaldo.

Athletes: They’re just like people!