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Tottenham has a problem only Arsenal can solve

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Yeah, this could get fun. Or weird.

this isn't the Emirates, but that's on the photo editor not me
this isn't the Emirates, but that's on the photo editor not me
Stanley Chou/Getty Images

As you may or may not know, Tottenham Hotspur wants to build a new stadium. This should surprise nobody, as White Hart Lane isn't particularly large, and if you want to compete at the highest levels you need to be able to sell tickets (or have a robber baron run your team, or both). The problem is this – where do they play while the new stadium is being built? Goodness knows Spurs couldn't build anywhere other than immediately adjacent to their current location, otherwise they'd lose the only thing they have over Arsenal.

The original plan was to use Wembley Stadium for big games and the stadium in Milton Keynes for the rest, but it appears the Premier League thinks that's not possible.

They would have to play in a single stadium for an entire year for the integrity of the competition. You cannot have 19 home games with 10 at Milton Keynes and nine at Wembley. That is completely, completely unfair. That will not be allowed in our competition.

They know the rules and what we require. They have to provide a stadium. We can’t have a fettered fixture list.

Clubs have to be able to deliver 19 home games in the slots that are required...They have to work it out with Wembley or wherever they want to play, and decide if they could deliver that level of commitment to us.

That's Premier League chairman Richard Scudamore. He has a different solution. You're probably not going to like it.

Premier League fixtures are paired so Liverpool and Everton, Tottenham and Arsenal and Manchester United and Manchester City do not play at home on the same weekend. So it is perfectly possible to have two teams playing in one stadium.

You might very well argue that in some circumstances that would be desirable but I do know the reasons why it would be difficult.

The emphasis there is mine, because what he's proposing is that Tottenham play their home games at the Emirates Stadium while Spurs build their new one.

I have exclusive footage here of Arsène Wenger and Ivan Gazidis responding to calls from the Spurs offices on the matter.

Logically it does make some sense. But this is sports, and logic is rarely an issue. Unless forced somehow to do it by the Premier League or the FA, Arsenal has no motivation to assist Tottenham. There are issues, like the fact that the more...committed Spurs fans might take it upon themselves to vandalize the stadium of their arch-rivals. There's also the fact that it would effectively give Arsenal two home North London Derbies, which I mean, I'd be okay with that but it doesn't seem great for "the integrity of the competition."

I would imagine that it'd be pretty difficult for Tottenham to make this actually happen. But in the meantime, it's pretty funny. And it's a good reminder of just how tough it is to build a top-class stadium without leeching off of anything and everything around you.