Spendy Wednesday: Inflated price tag edition

You might have heard the recent rumor that Lionel Messi is being sought by Chelsea for an astronomical, laughable transfer fee that would make even Spendy McWarchester blush: £200 million. While the current round of transfer rumors don't have Arsenal spending anywhere near that sum for a single player -- as if anyone realistically could -- there are some extravagant price tags attached to some of the rumor stories flying around.

With Lukas Podolski jettisoning his #9 jersey as he's off to #aha and #poldi with Inter Milan for the rest of the '14-'15 season, and with Yaya Sanogo potentially set to move to Bordeaux, maybe there's something in those rumors that one Edinson Cavani is coming to the Emirates from PSG. But wait! Despite last week's rumors that he could be had for £62 million, there's speculation that Arsene Wenger isn't keen to spend that much on a single player (see: history, reality), and so Express instead has Arsenal making an "audacious" bid for Atletico Madrid's Mario Mandzukic. (How audacious, they won't yet say.)

But wait! The same Express has Real Madrid's Isco coming over to Arsenal for a cool £64 million, while maintaining interest in Cavani, which means a £126 million upgrade to the Arsenal attack is pending, unless it's not. (The linked Express article also has the bonus of reviving the Goncalo Guedes-to-Arsenal-or-Liverpool coupled with the "new Cristiano Ronaldo" nickname that Express writers have glossed Guedes with.)

And, in an expensive defender update, Manchester United and Arsenal are rumored to duel for Mats Hummels, whose price tag seems to have risen to £35 million.

In perhaps more reality-based revelations, the Mirror is reporting that St. Etienne defender Loic Perrin has been contacted by Arsenal with interest, while Ipswich Town's Tyrone Mings has adopted "Arsenal's £8m target" as his new temporary title, as in, "Arsenal's £8m target Tyrone Mings in court for using mobile phone while driving," courtesy of the Daily Mail.

SPENDY SEZ: "I could have Messi, Isco, and Cavani for £326 million?!? I WILL SELL THE CHALET IF I HAVE TO!"