(sitting in his office before training today, muttering to himself)
These players aren't responding to the training and coaching like I thought they would.
I've tried everything I could think of to shake them out of this prolonged slump.
I swore to myself I wouldn't implement this, but you know what they say about drastic times calling for drastic measures.
/reaches into his pants pocket, grabs contents of pocket
I'll crush these beauties into a fine dust and slip it in the squad's Lucozade bottles.
Telling them to get their mind right hasn't worked, so I'll just let Miss Molly help them out.
/one hour later, on the training pitch
I swear, if she shoots me Come Fuck Me eyes one more time...
♪♫ I KNOW YOU WANT IT, I KNOW YOU WANT IT, I KNOW YOU WANT, BUT YOU'RE A GOOD GIRL, THE WAY YOU GRAB ME, MUST WANNA GET NASTY, GO AHEAD GET AT ME ♫♪
Alright, team, pull your pants up and let's talk 4-1-4-1 again with our new minds and attitudes. Who's ready to train?
/everyone's off being far too sexual with inhuman objects to listen to Wenger
//loses to Aston Villa 47-0 on Saturday