But That's Not Going To Fit On The Back Of A Jersey: Arsenal Allegedly Make First Summer Signing

Elias Chatzitheodoridis: Now that's a mouthful.

And according to Metro, that's a name that Arsenal fans will need to learn to spell in the coming years. Metro states that the teenager player "was training part-time at Arsenal’s academy in Greece when his huge talent became apparent," and once signed, will start working with Arsenal's youth teams toward possible, eventual inclusion into the first-team squad, where he would ostensibly challenge Nacho Monreal for minutes behind Kieran Gibbs, provided Arsenal settle for what they have at left back.

News of Chatzitheodoridis' signing (I'm just totally cutting and pasting, by the way) probably isn't what Arsenal fans are looking for this week, given news of Cesc Fabregas moving to Chelsea and a silly yet terrifying rumor that Hulk (SMASH!) would be coming Arsenal's way. Here are a few of the other rumors du jour:

Also from Metro: A possible £17M bid for Lorenzo Insigne (that's him in the photo, by the way, next to another guy Arsenal's been linked to), dependent on how he does in the upcoming World Cup;

An Iker Casillas shock switch to North London (those are The Mirror's words); and

Kingsley Coman! (He's a PSG winger, and Metro has the scoop).

Also, according to everyone, Laurent Koscielny is apparently trying to get into Spendy McWarchester's head by saying Arsenal needs to sign at least four players over the summer.