Spendy Wednesday: Let's Buy All of Real Madrid Edition

Goal.com is bringing the research -- clearly, from this article in which Arsenal has sent its prime deal makers to Madrid during the Champions League finals, five weeks before the transfer window opens ... Arsenal is indeed making a play for a mystery forward/winger type.

It certainly sounds like Karim Benzema, who doesn't look happy at Madrid according to some. There's a "huge hint" from the Daily Star that Benzema's coming to co-exist with Olivier Giroud like he does on the French national team -- that huge hint being Arsene Wenger noting, "Sure he will play in the Premier League one day." Mark the tape!

The mystery player, however, could be Angel di Maria. According to Express, Arsenal has put in a CONCRETE BID (all caps theirs) for the speedy winger, who wants out of Madrid despite being player of the game in that last game a few folks watched, where he set up some Welsh guy for the decisive goal. Other teams apparently want him, though, and his release fee is reportedly around £32.5 million, though he'll probably go for at least £40 million, just because.

There's a less expensive Real Madrid option, though -- according to Metro, if the £35 million bid for attacking midfielder Cesc Fabregas fails, Arsenal's "option" might be for £15 million defensive midfielder (and we're using the term roughly here) Sami Khedira, who has a Mesut Özil connection. Metro is also the first publication ever to point out that Antoine Griezmann, Carlos Vela, and Alexis Sanchez are wingers who should sign for Arsenal over the summer. Those are all unfamiliar names; are you telling me that Arsenal has a buy back clause we can activate for Vela, Metro?

Other transfer rumors du jour, according to this Mirror roundup of "reliable sources" include:

• Rodrigo, from Benfica, a striker you've barely heard of, for £24 million!
• A pu-pu platter of goalies from freshly-relegated teams, including David Marshall and John Ruddy!
• Swansea defender Ashley Williams for a bargain price of £3 million! (Welcome back to Arsenal Transfer Rumors, Ashley!)
• A Kim Källström resigning!

SPENDY SEZ: This is all well and good, and I like that Angel of Mary player, who is very fast and certainly worthy of £40 million, but I am waiting for the one Real Madrid player who will allow me to spend all £100 million of my warchest and maybe even more. I have credit cards! I can do this! Also, he is very attractive when he takes off his shirt and maybe there's money to be made with the advertisements for him. I believe you know who I'm talking about. FORSOOTH! MAKETH WITH THE RAIN! Bring me Ronaldo!