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Transfer Rumors: Balotelli, Berbatov, Chicharito Are All Coming to Arsenal

January's silly season gets off to a rollciking start with a trio of transfer rumors following TGSTEL's New Year's Day heroics and simultaneous injury.

But, really, who doesn't want to see this happen?
But, really, who doesn't want to see this happen?
Claudio Villa

Arsenal's backup striker situation was solved for about 2.3 seconds on Wednesday. That's the time it took for Nicklas Bendtner to break an 88th minute, interminable 0-0 deadlock against a stubborn Cardiff City side and to hurt his ankle simultaneously. In true Bendtner fashion, he'll now be out "weeks" during the very weeks in which he could have either cemented his place in the Arsenal squad or looked attractive enough to finally go out on transfer.

So it looks as if Arsenal's search for a striker to spell Olivier Giroud continues, and Silly Season has provided us with a trio of names that are more familiar to you than Michy Batshuayi.

Dimitar Berbatov, with six months left on his contract at relegation-bound Fulham, might bolt for the Emirates, according to The Independent. Advantages to this: Seasoned EPL striker, cocky enough to have worn a Keep Calm and Pass Me the Ball goal-celebration shirt (revealed after an actual goal scored last season), 32 and auditioning for one last decent contract. Disadvantages: Smoking regimen does not jibe with Wenger's fitness regimen, not among the list of historically motivated players.

Perhaps out of more speculation than based on an actual gathering of facts, Metro issued a New Year's Eve report stating that Mario Balotelli would be a good short-term solution to Arsenal's striker needs. Advantages to this: Balotelli could use some more tuning up in order to work on his statue-worthy World Cup 2014 goal celebrations, the potential for totally entertaining exploits to add to the ones that have made it onto his brand new shoes, and flashes of brilliance. Disadvantages: There are also flashes of complete boneheadness to go with those flashes of brilliance, and he's not exactly what you'd call a team player.

And there are rumors that Javier "Chicharito" Hernandez might be headed to the Emirates -- according to ESPN Deportes, Arsenal's interested in picking up the Mexican national striker, who's seen limited playing time despite Robin van Persie's recent returns to Injuryland. Advantages to this: Like with Balotelli, there's pre-World Cup seasoning to happen, plus it's always nice to take from United. Disadvantages: Chicharito's more of a poacher than anything else, so if Arsenal's looking to replicate Giroud's hold-up play where the striker involves the midfielders, this is probably not the answer.