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Untangling The Plate Of Spaghetti: The Higuain Transfer, Day...I Dunno, A Billion?

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No, sports fans, it ain't over yet.

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Just out of frame, there's a contract that has caught his eye.  SIGN THE DAMN THING ALREADY.
Just out of frame, there's a contract that has caught his eye. SIGN THE DAMN THING ALREADY.
Gonzalo Arroyo Moreno

So here we are, with the transfer window open and a lovely transfer breeze wafting through the air. And on that breeze blows in another discarded plastic shopping bag piece of news about the Gonzalo Higuain transfer - namely, his father, Quentin Tarantino impersonator Jorge Higuain, has said that Gonzalo has been given permission by Real Madrid to negotiate personal terms with Arsenal. The Twitters have it too.

This was a surprise to me, honestly - I thought all that stuff was done, and that all we were waiting for was for Real Madrid to announce their new coach, and for that coach to look in his player closet, decide he had one too many Gonzalo Higuains, and flog his leftover one to Arsenal. But apparently that's not where we are, and apparently now Gonzalo is going to call up Ivan Gazidis, ask for a big salary and an annual pass to the London Dungeon for his family, and then, once Gazidis counters with free lifetime admission to the British Museum in a test of both Gonzalo's London-museum-admission-charge-policy awareness and his negotiating savvy, this whole long, drawn out, tedious thing may finally be complete.

I'm with you. I want this done, and I'm not sure how much closer or further away it is from being done now than before you read this piece. Patience, my little grasshoppers. And be aware that Arsenal have more than one negotiator/scout/player dude, so it's not like Arsenal's whole summer is waiting on this, although it sorta feels like it at this point.