Arsenal v. Newcastle Man Of The Match: The Least Surprising MOTM All Season

Man of the match. GET HIM SIGNED - Clive Mason

After a heated debate that took about zero seconds, Theo Walcott is awarded the prestigious TSF Man Of The Match award.

Theo Walcott had a sort of bipolar first half. He scored Arsenal's first, but then later in the half Arsenal had a three-on-uh...one? two? Anyway, a breakaway in which Theo played the laziest pass I've seen him play in weeks, and for the rest of the half he made good runs and was in decent positions but was otherwise unremarkable. Then, the second half started, and Theo unleashed himself. Two more goals, including one with a ridiculous slide into home that would have gotten under most MLB catchers' tags, and an otherwise dominant half leave no doubt as to Theo's status as the final Man of the Match for 2012.

The only thing I have to add is that I hope his late Christmas present is a very nice pen and a paper on which it is written YOU ARE OURS FOREVER, that he then autographs. Come on Arsenal. Get it done. He's worth it - not just for today, but because he's got the potential to be legendarily good, and I'd rather that legend be forged in an Arsenal shirt than anywhere else, thanks.

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